After you become engaged, there is a lot of planning that needs to be done for your upcoming wedding. The first step is to notify the family on both the bride and grooms side, sharing in this exciting event. Then, you need to determine the people you will have in the wedding as your Maid of Honor and Bridesmaids. Typically, this is planned about year out from the actual wedding date, or as soon as possible if getting married sooner.
While it may seem as though you simply call up your best friends, ask them t be in your wedding, and that is the end of it. In reality, there is much more considering that these positions also come with responsibility and not everyone may share in your excitement of having them participate. That does not mean they do not love and care about you, but simply not in a position to take on the various tasks needing to be done.
Therefore, rather than just start dialing friends, take a couple of weeks to think things through carefully. Planning like this will help eliminate conflict and stress, as you get further into the wedding plans. Remember, right after becoming engaged, your emotions will be running high and this would be a time to make a bad decision. Therefore, let things settle down a bit and then take a methodical approach.
Start by making a list of all your dearest friends, ones that would be available both time and location wise at the time of your wedding. Then, go down the list and consider each of those friends schedules. Are there other commitments that would prohibit a friend from being in your wedding, does your friend want the responsibility, and so on? If you have a friend that is interested in being in your wedding but is not 100% sure of her commitment, you can always see if there is another role that would match her better. This way, she can still be in the wedding but not take on so much responsibility.
Another important thing to consider as you look at your list is the personalities of these individuals as a whole. After all, they may be wonderful friends separately but when a few get together, squabbles begin. Therefore, be sure you think of the overall picture and not just them individually. Again, if you see one or two of the people on the list that you really want in the wedding but you know they would not blend well with the other women, do not be afraid to ask them if they would take on another role. If the women are your very close friends, then you should be able to sit down and have a heart-to-heart talk with them.
One of the most important things when choosing your bridesmaids is to remember they need to be able to handle the role. You need to know with absolute certainty that they will be there for you through the entire time of planning your wedding, be able to help you make things, shop with and for you, give their advice on opinions, and stand by you. Otherwise, you will find that you are doing many of the things that the bridesmaids should do and you will be overwhelmed, exhausted, and probably a little bitter toward the friend for not keeping up her end of the bargain. That equation is bad all the way around.