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Weddings - Parents Seperated

Unfortunately, a high number of couples becoming husband and wife today come from divorced families. For some couples, this does not present any type of problem whatsoever. However, other couples are plagued by problems all stemming from divorced or separated parents that do not want to play nice.

When it comes to the seating arrangements at your wedding ceremony, things can be a little tricky. To avoid any surprises, start by planning the seating well in advance. That way, when everyone is being seated, the process is smooth. Traditionally, the brides mother would be the last person to be seated just before the start of the ceremony and then the first person to be escorted out at the conclusion of the wedding.

If your parents are divorced or separated but get along just fine, then they could be escorted into the church in the standard order of the grooms parents, brides grandparents, grooms mother and father, and then the brides mother. If there were a stepfather, he would accompany the brides mother with the biological father being seated in the second row directly behind the mother. If the stepfather will escort the bride down the aisle, then the brides biological father and any companion would be taken to their seats after the grandparents are seated but before the mother of the bride.

Now, if there were a stepmother and she and the bride are close, she could be seated after the brides grandparents are escorted to their seats. On the other hand, if there is any type of controversy, then the stepmother should be seated in a couple of pews back from the immediate family. Sometimes, when a divorced or separated parent brings a new boyfriend/girlfriend, or husband/wife, things can be very uneasy. In this case, you might opt to have them sit with the general group of guests rather than up at the front with the family.

If the groom has parents no longer together, the father would follow the ex- or separated wife into the church. The grooms mother would then be seated in the front row while the father would take his place in the second or third row. Again, any companions can be seated with the divorced or separated parent unless there are difficulties.

When it comes time to give the bride away, this is many times the most difficult process of all. Obviously, the biological father is the person that would traditionally walk the bride down the aisle but if the bride were raised by her stepfather, then he should be given the honor. If the father and mother are not together but have a good, healthy relationship, you might choose to be escorted by both of them.

While some people might thing this strange, and true, it is probably the exception and not the rule, if you have an equally close relationship to both the biological and step father, you can choose to have one on each arm, as you make your way to the front of the church. Finally, if someone tries to start something by being difficult, you will need to put your foot down and remind that person that this is your special day and if he or she chooses not to get along, then you will have to exclude him or her from the ceremony. This might be difficult to do but will save you tons of headache and embarrassment.

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